Joke

Need to release a bit of tension...

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
___________________________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
___________________________________________________________

Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what way, What are you up to, Nancy?

My goldfish died, replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, and I've just buried him.

The neighbor commented, That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?

Nancy patted down the last heap of earth and then replied, That's because he's inside your damn cat.

Ha...ha...