Is Being Different So Bad?

I was always intrigued by the way society behaved. As individuals, we have always and I guess, will always be, pressured to conform to an accepted social norm. By far, this is for the safety of the individual, and preservation of the society as a whole - so it's a good thing; it's a necessary thing. Of course, if every individual decides to go his or her own way, then there will be chaos and ultimately lead to collapse of that society. But who or what dictates this social norm? Anthropologists would have much difficulty nailing it down; after all it's been passed down from time immemorial.

Lately, I've been more intrigued at the individuals society define as 'different'. I believe at some point of their lives, everybody would have this experience. Smarty-pants are different because majority of people are of average intelligence. Gays are different because they want to be with their own gender. As for me, my colleagues look at me differently because I have no intention to specialise...they just think it's not the natural order of things. Yeah, even when I'm asked when I'll be getting married (hey, first things first...need to a get a girlfriend first lar!) I usually give the reply I'm happily single - as expected I get these strange looks most of the time. What's up with society? Why do you want me to be like everyone else? Actually being different may not be such a bad thing. After all, in evolution - diversity is the spice of life!

Last Thursday night, after all the delay with my flight out of Kuching a friend called me out as I was approaching KL Sentral - being the noob at nightlife, we went to this 'alternative' (in his own words) bar in Bangsar. It's kind of a nice and cosy place; not too noisy and loud...enough to talk by comfortably. After a while he told me that the place is a sort of a gay hangout...and two guys together there can be construed to be partners. Wow...my first experience at a gay bar. But there wasn't that many people there - and I could only see one couple. Perhaps it was a weekday, and gays have to work the next day too you know.

By society's norms, gays are different. They are so different to the point that society has a different set of rules for them. What I do not understand is, is being gay so bad as it is made out to be? I'm sure there are a lot of good, hardworking, honest people out there, making the world a better place for you and I...and they are gays. But how does society treat them? Like pariahs... Try coming out and you'll be ostracised. You can't be a public figure and be gay at the same time. Isn't it sad? I wish that in the future, such differences would be respected and given their rightful dues.

I'm just making a point that being different is not a bad thing. I'm not talking about black-and-white issues here, like killers and murderers, robbers and rapers, child abusers and paedophiles - those are obviously wrong. There are a lot of grey areas in society where being different is so looked down at that it is just not right. Having said that, changes and acceptance would be difficult, unless society decides it to be so.

Society still has got a long way to go...let's hope the road for the different would less rocky in the future.